March 5, 2009
I have reached the point of doubt in my current novel…that moment in the writing process when everything looks like total garbage to my eyes. This moment hits at different times for me, sometimes when I’m a quarter of the way through, sometimes when I’m a third done…in this case, almost exactly at the halfway point. I’m teetering on the brink of 50,000 words, which means I’m just about over the midway hump in finishing this 100,000-word novel. And yes, everything looks like crap. I’m wondering why I started this book in the first place. What possessed me? How am I ever going to finish it? Will the second half be as bad as the first? Come to think of it, everything I write looks like crap, not just this novel. It’s no coincidence my stories and books get rejected by one editor and agent after another! They’re all right about me! Every last one of them!
So there you have it. A peek inside my mind at this moment. How do I get past this moment of doubt? I just have to take a deep breath and keep writing. Say to myself, “Trust the process! The writer is not a judge of his own writing! This will come out fine if you stay the course and don’t give up no matter how much you want to.” But yeah, it isn’t easy. It’s a genuine crisis of faith, but the truth of the matter is, it happens with every book I write. It’s predictable and without merit. It’s the little voice of defeat trying to take over, and it deserves no response but a kick in the butt. Kick that voice right out of my office, as my mentors Dean and Kris would say.
So that’s what I’m going to do. And in the meantime, here’s another travel photo. This one’s from last year, from Bermuda. See you tomorrow!
Bermuda 2008
