October 30, 2019
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https://open.spotify.com/show/5DpbyaUrZJ2JvolrPHA1Xo
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I read an excerpt from The Asteroid That Stays Crunchy in Milk on the first episode of Introverted Extrovert Podcast. Thought I’d post it for you here:
The Asteroid That Stays Crunchy in Milk
(as read in podcast INTROVERTED EXHIBITIONIST 001)
Perched on the rim of the spacecraft that looked like a silver cereal bowl, Commander Quip, the little pink Breakfastronaut, blasted away with his handheld ray gun at the core of the monstrous, grumpy cloud-beast lumbering toward him.
A determined glare was fixed on Quip’s bright pink face, and the rainbow-colored pinwheel sticking out of the top of his bulbous head whizzed so fast, it blurred. His cherry-red spacesuit with the letter Q stamped in green on the chest was charred and torn from his battle with the beast so far.
“How dare you ruin a healthy breakfast for the gleeful Gleeblings of Nutrio 6!” Again, Quip squeezed the trigger of his ray gun, and another blinding white vitaminergy bolt sizzled into his target with a zeeee and a koooom. “Take that, foul creature! And that!”
The monstrosity’s roar echoed through the twinkling darkness of the Yummiverse, making the primary-colored planets wobble in their orbits. Reaching out with one billowing gray arm, the Grumptor cloud-beast grabbed the ring from a nearby world and tossed it like a frisbee with furious force.
The spinning ring whipped around Quip’s burbling bowl-craft, spinning it fiercely—swinging Quip in crazy circles around the rim.
“Whoaaa!” The bowl-craft suddenly snagged on the point of a crescent moon, ejecting Quip out into space. As he tumbled across the starfield, the Grumptor thrust out a massive hand and snapped him up, congealing around him like curdled milk.
Quip struggled as the gooey cloud closed in around him, but he couldn’t break free. A surge of frenzied action only tightened the smothering glop, encasing him in one last pocket of air.
His strength waned, and his head buzzed. Something in the cloud made him sleepy, and his eyes drifted shut.
Only to snap back open to the wailing of sirens in a very different place.
He was free of the Grumptor but stuck inside the cockpit of a ship. Lights flashed on control panels all around him, and his reflection on the cracked window before him was not at all what Commander Quip would expect.
Instead of a little pink spaceman with a pinwheel sticking out of his head, he was a scruffy, sweating human in a helmeted spacesuit, strapped to the pilot’s chair of a ship called the Paracelsus.
The truth flashed back to him as it always did, wiping away the breakfast cereal fantasy. Quip was only his great escape from a terrible reality, the only way he could deal with the harsh facts he had to confront.
The facts were these: His real name was Garvey Pope, he was an asteroid miner, and he was already doomed.
